Dating as a Single Parent

 

As the number of divorces and unwed parents continues to rise, so does the pool of single parents ready to date again.  This may be good news for single mothers and fathers looking to date but it doesn’t make the dating process any easier.  Here we will look at dating in the land of single parenting.Many of the issues you will run into when you are dating as a single parent will be similar to the issues that everyone faces while dating.  The concerns and worries that you held with dating before you had children will still be present as you date with children in you life.  A search for a mate now includes the search for a mate that will accept and care for your children, as well.  Someone just being okay with you having children won’t be enough if that person doesn’t want to be around your kids.There may be no perfect time to introduce your children to your date.  Many things will factor into how this meeting goes.  These things include the age of your children, the amount of time they have lived in a single parent home, your date’s experience around children, and the mood of your children at the time, as well as many other influences.Some people like all of their dates to meet their children while some prefer their kids meet the significant other only after the relationship becomes serious.  This decision comes down to the parent and what they think is best for their children.Some children may have a difficult time understanding why you are wanting to date again.  A child may still be angry about his or her parents separating or be jealous about you spending time with someone else.  There is no set time frame when it is best to start dating again.  If it feels too soon, though, it is probably too soon.  Always try to help your children understand your decisions and listen to how they feel about those decisions.Always consider what is best for your children before committing to a serious relationship.  It will take time for your children to develop a relationship with your new partner so don’t rush the process.Although some people prefer to introduce every date to their children, it is recommended that this wait until a relationship has turned serious.  This is especially true with young children who may not know how to express their concerns to you.  Meeting people that never come back into their life can be stressful for younger children.  Especially if the children have already gone through a divorce or serious separation involving their parents.  Older children may be more comfortable with the idea of you dating if they get to meet your dates.  In the end, it is your choice and what you think is best.Dating as a single parent can be challenging at times.  Keep an open mind and communicate with your children and dates and dating will be less stressful for everyone.

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Derrick is a single parent of two young boys.  He hopes to start a
non-profit organization to help educate men of the importance of
embracing the role of fatherhood and to
distribute helpful information to single dads.